less a party - more a series of memories to keep despite its darkness - the night far too young to leave it stole him - right in front of our eyes a quiet falls - forlorn, we remain inside the party resumes - with only his absence people somehow laugh - but bereft of his smile's presence it's louder ...

ill take a picture from the top of a bridge thatll show them -but will you kill yourself? eventually yes but i want to see their reactions -you care about them? of course not i just take pleasure in their misery -do you take pleasure in the misery of strangers? well no they have no reason to suffer ...

two magnets with their ends lined up. inseperable two can hold more than one their arms grow weak and they drop this disturbance setting them apart the push is strong both unable to return disillusioned with priorities they pick up the pieces as best they can with their weak arms weak weak arms ...

you were suicidal too greedy to kill myself alone you didn't get to choose you don't get to laugh not allowed to play the fun new games youre locked out i show my phone to the window i hope you don't look long im wasting the warmth inside maybe we could look together and watch someone enjoy what ...

we were similar. we both liked looking at the library. we would both dream about all the books we could read and stare into the catalog absentmindedly. that was our favourite activity. we didnt often read many books. the ones we did were those we would read together. but eventually that novelty wore ...

privileged. lucky. ungrateful. attractive but you haven't faced strife never been impoverished. You've had a wealth of fortune. you are wasting your life. you are wasting your good life. i hate it i hate you. you should smile unempathetic. i envy you judging me but you haven't walked a mile i regret ...

beautiful sunny day a customer comes in as usual, we exchange pleasantries as usual, he needs help as usual. we make conversation he explains something about magnets. i show some products. he makes some joke "those plastic palettes" he asks me if theyre free. i ask my boss if they are. he asks me if ...

my chest aches sporadic singeing sharp when i laugh or embrace it doesnt want to hurt it subsides on a press a short fleeting quick moment if only i had more resilient breasts then the pain would wait my heart adores me caring ruminating loving again when i laugh or embrace it wants to love so ...

i have been embarassed before it happens when you play a fool you're allowed to laugh together look at the silly and goofy self look at me no guilt with laughter no shame with power no humiliation with control you can control who looks at you the version of yourself they see viewing your reflection ...

yeah here's poetry each one will be its own reply

content warnings for topics discussed: grief, suicide, self loathing.

a real laundry list to be honest